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10 Steps to Restoring Relationships (Part 2) posted May 15, 2017

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#5 Be Patient

Having said this I ask you to Be Patient. If we aren’t used to our partner being nice to us, we may become suspicious. We also may have a difficult time receiving positive feedback or acts of kindness. Please do not let this discourage you from giving them. The energy of giving and receiving is the same, it is a circuit. Give, and give without an agenda.

#6 Walk Away From Conflict

If things get heated walk away, but you must also come back to it when the water has settled and calmly, respectfully, responsibly and lovingly talk about what happened. This is absolutely essential. Walking away includes coming back.

#7 Be Grateful

It is so very easy to dismiss your partner’s role, support, help, encouragement, desires, etc. because of familiarity. Start looking for the positives, the everyday things that without them in your life, you’d miss them or suffer in some way. I have a great experiment for you to do right now. Stop reading and look around the room you are in – just take in whatever you happened to see. NOW, do it again, but think the color red. What happens? You now have a visual filter of red and the pinks, oranges, maroons, mauves all start to look red. Do you get it? You have the power to change your filter. You can intentionally put on a filter that sees love, support, encouragement, joy, beauty, etc. instead of what you have been seeing.

#8 Respect Boundaries

Practice respect in your relationships. If someone asks for some time or space to sort through their emotions and evaluate their actions, give it to them. Do not be demanding in this manner, you will not have a good outcome or elicit love and trust. Violation of boundaries is the number one cause of resentment in the relationship.  Therefore you are responsible for identifying, communicating and honoring boundaries.

#9 Take Intentional Time

Take planned and intentional time every week to immerse yourself in your relationship. Make your relationship a priority. Create sacredness and safety to talk, to love, to touch, to romance, to resolve, to restore, to rekindle, to just be with one another. In the end, you will not look back and be happy you got the dishes done or watched that football game. However, your heart will be filled full if you can look back on your relationship and know you were present, you loved well, and you invested your heart and your time wisely. These are the dividends that pay off.

#10 Love

Remember The Vibration of Love Heals. It is only the vibration, the intention, the activation of love that heals – nothing else. When anything else is present it is based out of fear, and fear never heals. In a committed love relationship, if one is hurting, the other is also hurting. Be the one to shift the fear to love. When we let fear lead we create more fear and then we’ve got a mess to climb out of. Einstein put it this way, “We can’t solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.”

Commit to doing things differently, and allow love to grow and your relationships to heal. Let love, patience, and understanding lead the way, and watch your relationships become that which you always imagined real love to be.

If this article peeks your interests and you want to know more please visit my profile and reach out with any questions. I'm delighted to help.

In Joy,

Tracy

3100 PointsGold

Tracy Becker, LPC

/ Licensed Counselor & Life Coach / LPC