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Building Self-Confidence posted Jul 6, 2017

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Building your self-confidence will allow you to live life feeling strong, confident and self-assured. We are going to talk about the signs of low self-confidence and how you can recognize them and begin to conquer self-doubt.

While there is no single factor that leads to a lack of confidence, most often, it is the accumulation of negative experiences from our past, which we fail to deal with when they happen. It is also the result of our failure to recognize who we truly are and what hinders to our own growth.

Low self-confidence is defeating. It can define us and cause us to beat ourselves up emotionally. It can limit our abilities and keep us from growing and moving forward from our mistakes, failures and defeats.

It confines us to our comfort zone where everything is safe from potential humiliation and further mistakes. We then are stuck in that comfort zone believing that we shouldn’t move away from it because if we do we will only be left hurt and disappointed.

Once you are stuck in that zone, it is very hard to move forward in life, which keeps us from achieving our dreams, reaching our goals and living a rich full life. Even when we tell ourselves that no matter how harsh and messed up things get, we shouldn’t surrender to the inner critic that thrives inside us we are still filled with a self-doubt and a profound lack of confidence.

Low self-confidence usually develops during our childhood. Unfortunately, many of us have family, teachers, friends and enemies who are more than happy to point out our mistakes and/or faults rather than praising our talents.

They may not even realize what they're doing or how big an impact they are having on your self-confidence. They may not even say anything to your face, but often their actions speak louder than words, which makes us feel inadequate and worthless early on in the developmental years.

Perhaps you live under cold critical eyes of someone who doesn't see the good in anything. Maybe you are related to an over achiever and live in the shadow of their accomplishments. Perhaps those around you make you feel like you can't do anything right. These are all triggers that can make you feel inferior and inadequate which only adds to your lack of confidence.

With poor role models and lack of support, many grow up feeling as if they are incapable of doing certain things, growing and achieving anything of value. When in fact, each of us has our own inner strength and power to take control of our lives. We just have to have the confidence to do it.

Once you recognize the underlying causes of your lack of confidence, you can begin the process of overcoming the impact it has on your life. The best place to start is by evaluating the triggers that smash your confidence and make you feel inadequate. A good place to start is by keeping a journal.

Write down times when you're feeling less than confident and what caused you to feel that way. You should also write down things that you could do differently that will help make you feel better and more confident about yourself. By identifying these triggers and combating them with positive reinforcement, you can begin to move forward and become the self-confident person inside you.

680 PointsSilver

Deborah Brown, PMP, CPC

/ Certified Business Coach