There’s nothing more dangerous than a closed heart, and let’s face it we’ve all been there.
When the love of our life says they’ve found someone new, we don’t book our dream job, and everyone looks so happy on Facebook, it’s easy to fall into that trap of shutting down and giving up.
But learning how to love through heartbreak is something we can all do.
Yes its fun to wallow in misery a la Bridgette Jones and eat ice cream while dancing to All By Myself, but that doesn’t help us heal. It only reinforces how we don’t want to feel.
And since our energy flows where our attention goes, if you want to recover from heartbreak quickly you have to change your focus.
So the next time your heart is broken and you can’t get out of bed, don’t slam the door, curl up in a ball and declare “I'm NEVER GOING TO LOVE AGAIN!”
Try this instead:
Get in touch with your Inner child. Remember that girl or boy who fell off their bike and mom made it all better with a kiss? Yeah, that one. That’s the part of us that knows how good it feels to be loved, so go there and give your little self some TLC. You can watch a childhood favorite film, do an activity you loved or eat one of your favorite foods. It doesn’t matter as long as that kid inside knows it’s going to be ok.
2) Hug yourself. Yes, literally. You know how there are tree huggers out there? Hugging trees is great, but even better is hugging ME. Your body loves to be touched and it reacts positively to being held, so don’t be afraid to go there. Hugging yourself is the kind of embrace you need to help you feel safe again and all it takes is what you’ve got!
3) Feed yourself nurturing foods. It's easy to get lost in the temptation to drown ourselves in booze and pizza, but that type of stuff doesn’t help us heal. It numbs the pain. And that is a sure way to stay stuck in your misery longer. Instead of reaching for that bag of M &M’s, go find yourself a special cup of tea and sip it or indulge in a fresh green salad. That lets your body know you love it, as opposed to treating like a wasteland. And a happy body has a happy heart.
4) Get creative. It doesn’t matter if it's cooking, singing, dancing, decoupaging your journal or making a mixed tape. Our true selves love to be acknowledged, and one way to connect with that part of us is by accessing our creativity and doing the things that we enjoy. So don’t just sit there and cry. Channel that energy into what you love and create something beautiful. Your inner artist will thank you for it!
5) Move your body. Our bodies are made up of energy, so the best way to get out of a funk is to move into a new one! Movement of any kind whether it’s dancing, exercise, yoga or just plain breathing consciously can help relieve that heaviness in the heart and replace it with more joy. Even if it’s 5 minutes to start don’t let yourself give in to the desire to go numb and lose your feelings. Our feelings are our greatest gift and moving helps us access them.