How do you make sex spectacular?
Rules (“should and “should not’s) and fears can hold us back from completely letting go and allowing ourselves to enjoy our sexual experiences fully. How can we relax and really enjoy everything that sex can be?
The key is to address our experience with ourselves first. Only then can we experience what we want to with another person.
“Here are 6 simple secrets to spectacularly satisfying sex”
Simple Secret #1:
Imagine the experience.
Imagine all the excitement, pleasure, and ecstasy, the comfort and connection, the intimacy and relaxation. Imagine the feelings and sensations fully enough that you are already experiencing them.
This way, you’ll already feel like this is real for you—that you can experience this (since you’re already getting quite a good internal preview of what this feels like)—and you’re priming yourself for having this kind of experience supported by your life.
Simple Secret #2:
Let go of the rules.
“Should's" and “should not”s have no place in any positive relationship—with yourself or anyone or anything else. They shut us down rather than opening us up.
In a positive relationship (with ourselves and with another)—where deep, comfortable, pleasurable intimacy is possible—there’s openness of communication and the feeling of freedom to express ourselves as we are—what we think, what we feel, and what we want. There is only what you would like to experience and what it feels right for you to do or what it doesn’t feel right for you to do from that place.
So, rather than imposing rules to try to get what you want out of fear that you won’t, just focus on what you want to experience and listen to and act on what feels good and right from there, and you’ll actually get the results you want—smoothly, naturally, and effortlessly.
Simple Secret #3:
Accept yourself and get comfortable with yourself.
Imagine what you’d like to experience ultimately, and accept where you are on the way there. You don’t need to arrive at perfection or success or whatever to be there. You need only to be headed in that direction. Good feelings (and bad feelings) tell us the direction we’re headed, not where we are.
So focus on what you’d like to experience, and take action from there, and accept where you are at each step along the way since you’re on the way toward more external support for your desired internal experience. And you will feel good about yourself, and you will feel good in general.
Simple Secret #4:
Be the kind of person you want to be with.
Be kind, be respectful, be appreciative, be attentive, be interested in your own well-being. Act on what feels good, and not on what doesn’t feel good, in every area of your life—your body, career, living situation, family, friendships, and everything else.
If you attend to and focus on you’re feeling good and act from good feelings, you’ll get more reasons to experience good feelings. (If you focus on your feeling bad and act from bad feelings, on the other hand, you’ll get more reasons to experience bad feelings.)
Simple Secret #5:
Connect with yourself.
Recognize that what you want isn’t actually an experience with another person; it isn’t actually physical sex. Lust is an expression of your internal guidance system communicating to you that it wants to connect with you.
So connect with yourself—in regard to every area of your life, including your body, career, living situation, family, friendships, etc.
Rather than tuning out, avoiding, and escaping yourself, tune in and face yourself. Imagine experiencing what you truly want to experience, respond to your doubts and fears, and do what you’ve been wanting to do that would make you feel closer to yourself. Pursue whatever would make you feel fully alive and fully yourself.
Simple Secret #6:
Enjoy the journey.
It’s not about the destination. If you are always trying to get to some experience, you will never get to it. Be in it and present to it now.
Enjoy the tension, the buildup. Enjoy the dance, enjoy the rhythm. Enjoy the journey. In addition, you will experience what you want to experience every step of the way, making every aspect of it pleasurable.
“Here are three key steps to putting these secrets into action successfully”
Imagine The Feelings Of Having Your Desired Experience.
Imagine what it would feel like to have spectacularly satisfying sex. Imagine the desire growing within you, the feelings of connection and love, closeness and intimacy, the wonderful rhythm, being in sync with another, the explosion of shared pleasure. Imagine the warm, electrifying energy flowing up and down your body in waves of sensual ecstasy. Imagine feeling safe, comfortable, and so relaxed, being able to totally let go and be completely present to the sensations of touch, the experience of flowing blissful energy all throughout your body.
Before we can experience something in the world, we need to imagine it, create it in our minds, make it real for ourselves as an experience of thoughts and feelings and desires about it before it has any physical reality associated with it. Notice how as you imagine this experience, you are already experiencing it. This is the key to bringing about a physical reality that supports this experience—in this case, spectacular sex with another person.
So step into this experience as fully as possible in your mind, feel it in your body, live in it for a little while.
Respond To and Redirect Incompatible Thoughts, Feelings, And Desires.
When you are trying to imagine the experience of spectacularly satisfying sex, address and redirect any thoughts, feelings, or desires that come up that are negative and incompatible with the positive experience that you’d like to have. You do this by first acknowledging that every thought, feeling, and desire that comes up is not you speaking; it is your internal guidance speaking to you about you, and not about any other person or anything else.
The world outside you isn’t the source of the experience ultimately, only a reflection of it and support for it. You are the ultimate source of your experience, originally, and so you are the one, and the only one, who can change it.
If you experience anything that doesn’t fit the experience you’d like to have, and you ignore it and talk over it with forced positivity, dismiss it as unworthy of your attention, or tune it out, you will further create a relationship with yourself that is incompatible with having comfortable and positive intimacy, connection, and pleasure, and this will be reflected in your experiences with other people.
So, instead, validate the experiences you have in reaction to the world as being reactions to you—reactions by your internal guidance to how you’ve treated it and made it feel.
Listen To Yourself And Act In Accordance With What Feels Right.
Listen to yourself. Listen to what feels right about what actions to take—about who to be with and when and in what forms.
If you don’t listen to yourself, respect your own boundaries, and fulfill your own wishes, you won’t get the experience you want with another person in the mirror of the world either. But if you do listen to yourself, your experience with another can be just as spectacular.
Create Spectacular Experiences!:
If you’d like help creating spectacular experiences in your life—in a relationship, career, or any other area—contact me for a free session now!
Thanks for reading! Have a spectacular day! ;)