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Resolving Conflicts Through Personal Awareness posted Dec 18, 2017


Do you know what triggers your anger and what strategies you can use to manage it? Are you familiar with alternate ways for expressing your anger instead of "blowing your top"? Do you ever experience the consequences of angry behavior? Wouldn't it be nice to take control of your feelings so it doesn't become a problem in your life?

There are some things you can do to resolve your conflicts in a healthier, more appropriate way than becoming overwhelmed and overly emotional.

The first thing to do is educate yourself on the "red flags" or warning signs of an anger management problem. Naturally, you need to be open and receptive and have some awareness of how your behavior is impacting others and affecting your life. The way you know this is by identifying how many times people say to you, "Why are you always so angry?" and then realize that what they may be saying is probably true.

The next thing to do is be willing to change how you respond to frustrating, challenging, unfair circumstances. Life will always be unjust in one way or another. Sometimes things will go your way and other times it won't. If that gets you angry, more often than you like, you need to assess how else you can handle these kinds of situations. The way you do this is by seeing how other people deal with injustices in their life and ask them what they do to get through it.

Finally, you need to try new behaviors to calm yourself. Whether you join a yoga class, start meditating, listen to soothing music, go for therapy, read inspirational material, connect with nature, start a new hobby, exercise or just breathe, you need to redirect your anger in a way that is healthier and more productive. Why waste all that energy doing things that could harm your reputation or impact you physically? Learn what you need to do to "realign" yourself and rejuvenate your inner peace and you will be much happier for it.

There is nothing wrong with having conflicts, but if your life is one big conflict, with major dramas and excessive aggravation, something you are doing is contributing to the havoc. Once you make the appropriate changes, with patience and acceptance, your life will improve and your relationships will feel better because you are doing better.

Remember, the only things you can truly work on are your thoughts, words, and actions. All three can alter your difficult situations and give you personal awareness for a healthy transformation.

2760 PointsGold

Amy Sherman, LMHC

/ Therapist & Certified Relationship Coach / LMHC