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This is the second article in the series of articles I will write about grief and duel processes. If you have missed the first one, here is the link for it: https://chatowl.com/blog/896/grief-and-duel-processes-part-1-a-short-introduction . This article is a short introduction to what grief and duel processes are. At the end of the article, I mention one of the mainstays on the subject, which is the Kübler Ross “model” (more on that afterwards) of grief and the book where it first ...
The age-old question... How to tell your future. Is it possible? Yes... You can tell your future because you create your future. It is true you can't control your circumstances, but you can control your thinking. Your thinking is responsible for your outcome, regardless of the circumstances. Your future is not dependent on circumstances, your future is formed by how you respond to your circumstances. The key to success is your belief in your future. Your belief is a result of your ...
When something is wrong with me, I like to sleep with my Bible. For some reason outside of my comprehension, it makes me feel better. Foxy Roxy, my Pomeranian, kind of does something similar. She has been sleeping outside of my grandmother’s room lately, watching over her every night. But tonight when I got home, she was waiting for me under my bed. She is that kind of dog, she'll sit with me when I'm injured, overwhelmed, or just in need of something. So it was touching to know that ...
So I did something today I never do: I got a manicure and pedicure. While there, I asked the amazing woman who did my nails why exactly people get pedicures. She said, “For two reasons: to make themselves prettier and to clean their feet. And (Bonus reason) it is relaxing…let someone takes care of you.” I had to sit with that for a moment. Let someone take care of you. You see, I am a consummate caregiver, the kind who at times loses herself in the wholehearted pursuit of loving ...
Are You Caring for an Aging Parent? We are all familiar with the Baby Boom era when after World War II Americans felt a sense of relief and went on an approximate 18-year-long trip to love land (I mean baby land). Out of that journey sprung 74.9-million babies that came to be known as Boomers. Now, fast forward 60-plus years and our beloved soul-children, hippy-dippy-Boomer dudes have adult children of their own (Millennials). So our Boomers are grandparents and now they’re ...
“Life’s challenges are not supposed to paralyze you, they’re supposed to help you discover who you are.” I love this quote from Bernice Johnson Reagan.  How we deal with life’s challenges, what skills we learn during the process, how we communicate during these times, and how we take care of our selves in the midst of a challenge, all shape us into who we are. This is the stuff we are made of. Do you become paralyzed by the challenges you face on a daily ...
This is a question I hear quite often in my practice. My answer is normal is what lies on a bell curve between 0 to 2 standard deviation of the mean. Please reference the picture below.      If one looks at the curve, normal is on a spectrum mathematically speaking; there is not one hard true normal. There is an average or mean; however, normal is a range. Yes, there are outliers and that does not make the outliers wrong or bad just different. Being inside the ...
Are you trying to do it all, but coming up short? Are you feeling overwhelmed by everything that you have going on in your life, and you don’t see an end to all the doing? Maybe you have a 9-5 job, maybe you’re also a parent, a partner, maybe you’re also going to school, or transitioning to another job, and maybe you are even trying to pursue another passion in your life. The point is, you are feeling strung out...or that all of your activities and responsibilities are pulling ...
“Life will give you whatever experience is the most helpful for the evolution of your consciousness.” —Eckhart Tolle If we all remembered this in each and every moment of our existence I would be out of work very fast, yet I would be joyful. For living in this concept we all must truly be in acceptance, knowing, love and joy, and I would be thrilled to live in this world. Some years back, I studied Buddhism and there are these amazing stories of great Buddhist teachers who ...
Each person has a different set of fears and “reasons” why expressing their emotions is a difficult task. That is an entire topic unto itself. Almost anything in life that involves other people involves the possibility of fear or the fear of rejection. We can either learn to use fear to empower us, or take a backseat allowing it to have power over us. I teach my clients and audiences that “FEAR” is actually an acronym. It stands for “False Experiences Appearing Real.” In ...