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Coming Soon | December 2019
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Recent questions in Well-being

Dr. Debra LMFT (MT2416)

/ The Relationship Expert / LMFT
Trust is a choice. Even if you were coming to see one of us in person, it will take a certain amount of personal trust. I had to say that. Now, on our website, you will see a range of professionals. Each of us has our own set of credentials. Many of us have advanced degrees, and most of us we have been trained, certified, and/or licensed by professional boards. Our certifying organizations have ETHICAL STANDARDS that we have each sworn to adhere to. BUT even without these boards of certification, many of us are naturally helpers or healers. We were born to do this work. SO, THE LAST thing we want to do is HARM another human being (living thing for that matter). My invitation then is that you understand that our goal is to "do no harm." NOT THAT WE ARE INCAPABLE of wrongdoing, but our INTENTION IS to HELP. The only way you can begin to TRUST one of us is to shop around the ChatOwl website. Read the profiles, study the photos you see--you can actually see who we are by looking at our pictures. Then schedule a 1-time session to see if the fit is there. Then, TRUST YOURSELF to choose the therapist that will best meet your specific needs.

Dr. Debra LMFT (MT2416)

/ The Relationship Expert / LMFT
Well, there are a number of reasons that you MIGHT seek therapy on the internet. I'll list them below. I'll start with personal reasons then I'll share some professional reasons why. Then you think about what makes sense to you and make your decision. Personal Reasons: 1) You may to too shy (or embarrassed ) to share with a professional face-to-face. 2) You can see a therapist using only audio, so she/he won't see you. Say if you are sensitive about your appearance--swollen jaw or something. Or, you have some other physical disability that makes leaving your home too much trouble. 3) You don't or can't drive or don't have transportation. 4 ) It's convenient and private--if you don't want anyone to know--no one will see you going or coming. 5) If you want to see your therapist and be seen by her or him then you can use your video capabilities. So you have choices based on your personal needs. I'm sure there are more, so these are just to get you thinking. Professional Reasons 1) Transparency: profiles of ACTUAL professionals (not models!) are listed with REAL FACTS about each one. So you can read about the therapists or coaches yourself and see their credentials to make a firsthand decision about who they are and what each one stands for. 2) Cost: Like most things online, it's cost effective. But don't get it twisted--it's not cheap advice! 3). Training: ChatOwl counselors are well trained, degreed, licensed and/or certified in specific areas of expertise. 4) Real Testimonies: The testimonies that you see on our site are FIRST-PERSON COMMENTS from our clients. Again, we want you to know the quality of our work. 5) Money-back guarantee: What else is there to say except: "You have nothing to lose, except the problem you bring to your fabulous online counseling session :).

Dr. Debra LMFT (MT2416)

/ The Relationship Expert / LMFT
Wonderful question!!! If you broke down the word "therapy" you will find the word "heal". So essentially, to get therapy (of any kind) is to seek healing. The kind of therapy that you're seeking on the ChatOwl site is essentially "talk therapy" or healing through talking. We have therapists from several different training or philosophical perspectives on our platform. BUT, the one thing we all have in common is that we want to help our clients "heal" mental and/or emotional pains. What's in a Name? You should also know that while we use different words to describe our specific professional training such as Clinical Social Worker, Clinical Psychologist, Marriage and Family Therapist, Mental Health Counselor, or Psychiatrist we will all (most often) answer to the single name "psychotherapist." By the way, the first part of the word "psycho" means "soul" and the second part, "therapy" mean "to heal." The parts together literally means "to heal the soul." Beautiful," isn't it? Second Part of Your Question: When to seek help? You know you need to seek a psychotherapist when you have tried EVERYTHING else--talking to your closest friends, parents, siblings and/or grandparents; watching talk shows; and consulting with your priest, rabbi, or preacher; reading books on related topics; watching videos and listening to audio programming AND nothing has worked. So, shop around and you'll see different therapists with different titles. Read the profiles, Study the photos then listen to yourself when you find the professional that seems to speak to your specific need for healing. That's the one! Be well.

Heather Dempsey

/ Holistic Life Coach
I find that when an individual is centered in who they are, what they believe, their morals, values, standards and why, it enables them to feel much more confident and secure in their boundaries and self respect which in turn makes it comfortable to assert themselves. Helping a young adult (or any individual at any age) discover who they are, what their values are, help them realize what matters most and with that information they will have a stronger desire to move toward things that are in alignment and further from things that are not. I have a short online course on the topic of values called True Happiness. I've been offering it for free this week and I'm happy to send you an invite if you would like to check it out.

Rachel Pepin

/ Branding Advisor
Getting out and doing something even when you don't feel like it: Can be going for a walk, putting on your favorite tunes, grabbing a hot beverage, taking a class, slowing down, calling a friend.. often by helping out someone else.

Heather Dempsey

/ Holistic Life Coach
You are not alone this confuses so many individuals! Feeling are the body's response to situations/decisions/environment, etc. They are great at helping us see if we should keep doing what we are currently doing because the feelings are positive or pleasant or if we should switch gears to experience more positive emotions and move away from unwanted feelings. Some may say knowing and intuition are one in the same. Others may say "Knowing" is an enhanced psychic ability known as claircognizance. And intuition is the inner wisdom and ultimate guiding system. I agree with the latter. Thoughts are what our mind create about situations, decisions, environment, etc. based on experiences, habits patterns. I adore this topic and tend to over talk it, so I wanted to keep this simple. I hope it helped. If you like to take it a step further, let me know. I'm happy to dive deeper :)

Javier Molina, LP

/ Licensed Psychologist / LP
Death related topics and events are never easy to approach, especially when you want to find something that feels adequate to say to someone you are concerned about. What I have found to be most helpful in these kind of situations is to simply be there for your beloved ones and let them know that they can rely on you. Stare them in the eyes with kindness and love and tell them “If you need anything, a shoulder to cry on, someone to share your feelings and thoughts about this, a hug, or just someone to be with and hang out, call me. I am here for you.” People that just experienced a loss have so many things in their mind that a short, heartfelt “I am here for you” and a warm hug are many times the only real things that someone can do to help them in that moment.

LaTasha Russell, Psy.D.

/ Relationships Expert
Most of the time someone that's in love thinks about the person all the time, smiles when talking about them, is overly excited to see them, wants that person to be the first and last person they speak to during the day and does not want them to leave. However, being in love makes someone blind to the truth and at times, make decisions they would not normally make if they were not in love. Some of these decisions can be detrimental and life-changing.

Dr. Debra LMFT (MT2416)

/ The Relationship Expert / LMFT
Great question: My response-- F-E-A-R F-Fear that we will be judged, punished, rejected, shamed, discouraged..AND that our emotional response will not be reciprocated and/or authentically received; AND that the expression emotion will diminish us in some way--we'll appear weak and needy, either by our own judgement or by the judgement of the other person(s). E- Expression of emotions is often criticized in many cultures and most of us want social acceptance from our tribe. Since emotional expression is often frowned upon, many of us are inept in expressing emotional ourselves , so we avoid it because we don't know how to adequately and effective emotionally express ourselves without being overly or "underly" (new word :) ) expressive. A-Anxiety is a sign of fear manifested in physical symptoms--sweaty palms, nervous stomachs and many other idiosyncratic behaviors of discomfort. So, instead of expressing ourselves we try keep cool and appear that we are not afraid, while inside the body is waging a fearful war. R-Retribution--Some expect and fear being rejected, punished, or ostracized for being emotionally expressive. Depending on one's culture the type of rejection may range from being simply being ignored to being outwardly ridiculed. Exception: Of course in some cultures the more emotionally expressive (sometimes explosive) you are the better adjusted you are. So, most of what I've said applies to who it applies to.

Deborah Englund

/ Coach for victims of narcissistic abuse
Get to know Yourself better and work on Your good and strong sides. You cant be good at everything and live up to everybody elses expectations. You know what You can do. Make more of that and enjoy Yourself. Nobodys perfect and that is perfectly ok. Respect Yourself more, and dont respect others to much. Relax.
To see more, click for the full list of questions.